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The good morning, good night thread

Started by Ed, October 22, 2007, 03:49:05 AM

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Russell

#4920
April 15, 2021, 02:21:11 PM
1st lockdown I lost a bit (of weight), 2nd and 3rd I gained it all back and more ... but not 28 lbs.  That's not to say much - I need to lose at least double that to get to anything close to a sensible weight.  Weight aside, things are fine.  I also nearly wrote 10 words!

Ed

#4921
May 04, 2021, 04:38:24 AM
Good on you, Russel. I'm still doing the 5:2 diet, today being a fasting day (ouch), I'm also doing the 100 push-ups a day for Cancer Research, which is hard work. Raised about £200 for them so far. Got my second covid jab today, at 11am, so I'm guessing the press-ups are going to be harder tomorrow. I remember last time my arm felt like when somebody gave you a dead arm at school, only it lasted all day.

My most recent scan showed swollen lymph nodes in my lungs, meaning the cancer may have spread. Got to have another scan in a couple of months to see for sure. Think I'm in for a rough ride, guys.
Planning is an unnatural process - it is much more fun to do something.  The nicest thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise, rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression. [Sir John Harvey-Jones]

delboy

#4922
May 13, 2021, 05:02:10 PM
Bloody hell, Ed. Fingers crossed for you, buddy. Hope there's more smooth bits than rough bits on your ride, and a nice ending.
"If you want to write, write it. That's the first rule. And send it in, and send it in to someone who can publish it or get it published. Don't send it to me. Don't show it to your spouse, or your significant other, or your parents, or somebody. They're not going to publish it."

Robert B. Parker

Ed

#4923
May 18, 2021, 07:07:29 AM
Thanks Del. Yep, staying positive and keeping fit. I think training up to the operation helped a lot with recovery. I stepped it up the week before. I'll try and keep it going as long as possible. Perhaps strangely, I'm still not scared. Glad about that -- just goes to show things could always be worse.

Doing 100 push-up a day in May for Cancer Research (no atheists in foxholes). Have done 1,800 so far this month :o and raised £210 for the cause. Wish me luck
Planning is an unnatural process - it is much more fun to do something.  The nicest thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise, rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression. [Sir John Harvey-Jones]

elay2433

#4924
September 15, 2021, 07:24:01 PM
Oh man. I'm sorry to hear that, Ed. I hope things are looking better for you.

Geoff_N

#4925
October 03, 2021, 07:27:45 AM
Just popped in to say hi. Read your posts, Ed. That's tough for the cancer. How are you coping?

I used to do 50 press-ups every day from about 14 to 30 when first child was born and I either didn't have time or found lifting the kids up and down did as well. Now I can do the plank for 3 boring minutes but press-ups? 5 or 10 if I'm lucky.

Ed

#4926
October 10, 2021, 10:29:10 AM
Hi Jerry and Geoff -- nice to see folks dropping by still. I've been OK so far, thanks. Still feel the aftereffects of the operation some eighteen months on, now. Have just been told there are definite lesions on my lungs and have to go and take a lung function test ahead of an operation to remove the lesions. I'm guessing there will be chemo after that. Not looking forward to it. I feel a bit like I'm slowly being whittled away from the person I was to whatever's left after the next round, and the one after that. It's a bit daunting.

Seriously unimpressed with my doctor at the hospital. He rang the other day to say the scan results were clear. I sighed relief and asked again to be sure, "Ah," he says, the one in your prostate is smaller, from a grade 3 to a 2 and the nodes in your lungs are bigger than they were at the last scan." So far from being clear then, you twat, I felt like saying. It's since then, with no subsequent scan in-between that they've stopped calling them nodules and started calling them lesions. I don't trust them at all  :idiot:

Still, fuck it. I'll deal with whatever comes and I'll try to live my life as normally as possible. Worst part is I've got to tell the kids and my parents again. Hated that last time.
Planning is an unnatural process - it is much more fun to do something.  The nicest thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise, rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression. [Sir John Harvey-Jones]

Ed

#4927
October 25, 2021, 05:44:21 PM Last Edit: October 25, 2021, 05:46:35 PM by Ed
Got an appointment a week tomorrow to have a pre op assessment. At least something is happening now. The worst parts are waiting and not knowing the plan. If it's anything like last time it meant the operation was less than a month away, so it might be a crap Christmas this year.

Told my sons today. They took it alright. I suppose they're getting used to it now. I'll put off telling my mother until I've seen the surgeon and know what's going on.
Planning is an unnatural process - it is much more fun to do something.  The nicest thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise, rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression. [Sir John Harvey-Jones]

delboy

#4928
October 28, 2021, 01:56:18 PM
Hang on in there, buddy. Sending positive thoughts your way and keeping everything crossed that it all turns out well.

Derek
"If you want to write, write it. That's the first rule. And send it in, and send it in to someone who can publish it or get it published. Don't send it to me. Don't show it to your spouse, or your significant other, or your parents, or somebody. They're not going to publish it."

Robert B. Parker

Ed

#4929
October 29, 2021, 12:25:43 PM
Quote from: delboy on October 28, 2021, 01:56:18 PM
Hang on in there, buddy. Sending positive thoughts your way and keeping everything crossed that it all turns out well.

Derek

Thanks Del, I appreciate it. Cheered me up a bit to see your words. Have to admit I'm feeling a bit apprehensive now. A bit sorry for myself. I've just looked up the route for Tuesday, so that I can be there on time, and I can feel my heart beating faster now. I'll find out on Tuesday how extensive the cancer is and how much lung function I'm going to lose, I guess. I hate the thought of being incapacitated again. I've been lucky until now, I've always been fit and strong. The last op put paid to that for a while, and I'm only now starting to feel back to my old self, almost, but I'm not as strong or as fit as I was last time. This time I might never feel the same again afterward. Might always be weak and short of breath. That's what worries me. It could be like being battered by waves on the shore -- you pick yourself up and get beat down again, and again, and that repeats, sapping your strength until you can't get up again. Scary.

Still, what will be will be. I've got my wife and sons supporting me here, and we have no financial worries. I wonder how people get on who go through these things trying to hold down a job and pay mortgages. It must be awful. We paid our off a while back, and my business will run itself, at least for a while. The people that work for me are capable and good at what they do. I'm just the hub of the wheel that organises things and makes the decisions.
Planning is an unnatural process - it is much more fun to do something.  The nicest thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise, rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression. [Sir John Harvey-Jones]

elay2433

#4930
November 07, 2021, 08:08:31 PM
That's hella rough, Ed. You appear to be in good spirit, and seem pretty stoic in the face of it all, which is a lot more than some people would be able to muster in such a situation. Good that you've got all your business in order and you've got family behind you. I've run quite a few calls on people in worse shape who don't even have family to lean on. I can't imagine what it's like for you or for them. The reality is, we're all pretty fragile when you think about it. My dad, only 63, not yet retired even, died on October 10th. He never quit. Was doing yard work at my brothers house when he just fell over and never got back up. It's got me looking at everything through a different lens. Hoping the best for you, buddy. You're a good dude, and you've got a lot of learning and wisdom in you from all you years here. Here's to wishing you get to keep on gathering it and sharing it.

Ed

#4931
November 10, 2021, 05:39:41 AM
Hi Jerry, thanks for the kind words. Sorry to hear about your dad. He went way too young, and that must be tough to reconcile. I don't know which is worse, for your brother to be there and have to cope, or for you not there at the time and hearing about his passing later. Awful either way. I'm guessing you're still in shock. Truly awful for your mother as well. I'm guessing they were together quite a few years. I can't imagine life without my wife we've been together so long.

What struck me for the first time, years ago, when my grandfather died, the first time anybody I knew and loved had died, was how the rest of the world just carried on like nothing happened. It was so massive to me, travelling to his funeral in a car, while people on the streets carried their shopping bags, chatted and laughed, and carried on with their lives, oblivious to what had happened. We all carry on with our lives with people dropping like flies around us. I wonder why it doesn't freak us out more in our day to day. It's horrific when you stop and think about it. As you say, we are fragile.

Had my consultation with the surgeon last week at the BRI, an old dingy hospital, creaking at the seams. It smelled of disinfectant and beef stew. Quite a shock after being in Southmead, which is brand new, light and airy, massive atrium lobby with concessions and a musician playing a grand piano in the mddle of a vast expanse of terrazzo floor. The news is, my consultant back at home dropped the ball again. No surprise there. I'm supposed to have a scan every three months and my last one was four months ago. The surgeon said it was too old to decide whether he operates or not. Apparently I've got three 'nodes', two in my left lung and one in my right. The right one got smaller between the two previous scans, one other stayed the same size and the third got bigger. He said if it wasn't for my history they wouldn't bother about things this size, 2,3 and 5mm. I've got a scan tomorrow and if nothing has grown bigger I'm off the hook for the time being. If something has grown, they will go in through my ribs under my arm about half way down my chest and do a partial lobectomy. The worst part is they have to guess, based on the scan results, where the growths are and cut out those sections of lung. The scan is taken with your lungs full and the operation is done with the lung blocked off and deflated. He played down the risks to a very small percentage of chance, but the words that stick in your brain are, "You may not survive the operation." Other risks include a blood clot to the brain. There's also a risk the rest of my life may be what they term a 'managed decline'.

So now life's on hold with the sword of Damocles dangling above my head again. It's usually a fortnight before I find out the scan results, at the least. Outwardly I'm my old phlegmatic self and I'll take what comes, but there's a definite tension here. I suppose I'm lucky that we are so busy I don't have much time to sit and dwell on any of it.

I hope things get better for those of you facing challenges. They generally do.
Planning is an unnatural process - it is much more fun to do something.  The nicest thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise, rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression. [Sir John Harvey-Jones]

delboy

#4932
November 19, 2021, 06:11:14 AM
Hey Jerry. Good to "see" you. Sorry to hear about your father. Mine passed away earlier this year, too. It's tough and sad times for everyone it seems. Let's just all hope that things get better across the board. And, Ed, still got my fingers crossed, buddy. If positive thoughts can help then they're already on their way.

In other news I've decided to have my first ever go at NaNoWriMo this month. I've always sort of looked down on the concept before, but I've not been writing much this last year (just a few short stories) and I was interested to know if the desire, the commitment, and the discipline was still there. I'm pleased to say that it's a triple yes. It's going really well and I've written every day and am currently on about 36k words. I didn't pal anything, I just dived in and started writing, but the story has come together really nicely and I've been really enjoying it. It's taken a lot of time and effort, and in a way I'd forgotten how hard the actual doing was, but I shall continue on after November and will try and finish the draft, and then we shall see...

Regards
Derek
"If you want to write, write it. That's the first rule. And send it in, and send it in to someone who can publish it or get it published. Don't send it to me. Don't show it to your spouse, or your significant other, or your parents, or somebody. They're not going to publish it."

Robert B. Parker

Ed

#4933
November 20, 2021, 11:12:10 AM
Nice one, Del. Keep up the good work. I thought about doing NaNoWriMo a few times, but that was as far as I ever got. I hope it goes well for you. I think it will -- you've got a writer's bones, which you've proved abundantly over the years.
Planning is an unnatural process - it is much more fun to do something.  The nicest thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise, rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression. [Sir John Harvey-Jones]

Ed

#4934
December 01, 2021, 04:54:06 AM
Final update. I'm booked for surgery on Monday to remove a portion of my lung. I was hoping I'd get away with it, but no such luck. Apparently the 5mm lesion is slightly bigger since the last scan. The rest have stayed the same. Hopefully that's a good thing. There's a specific growth rate for certain types of cancer and I'm thinking if the rest have stayed the same it may be a good sign.

Anyway, assuming I survive the op and don't stroke out, I'll see you on the other side. If I don't see you before, have a good Christmas.
Planning is an unnatural process - it is much more fun to do something.  The nicest thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise, rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression. [Sir John Harvey-Jones]
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