Worst pick up line you have heard

[evildeadgirl]

the worst pick up lines you ever heard

Before I was married---I went out to actually LISTEN to a band. I had a guy come up after he eyeballed every woman's hiney in the place(seriously he planted himself by the door and bum--watched ) He said that he didn't know how to come up and talk to me and my friend. Then he said "hi I'm Elliot--but don't hold it against me--I was born with it--ha-ha"
Now you can imagine what my response was-- to sum it up-- by the end--i realized --he had no sense of humor--a quick temper--and was not fond of me

Let's hear the worst pickup lines(you used or were used on you) Just for fun

[SharonBell]

I was a sophomore in college, and attended a mixer. At 5 feet 8 inches, I was probably one of the tallest females in the room. A redhaired guy whose head did not reach my boobs asked me to dance. His nose would have been in my navel. I swear.

When I said, "No, thank you, I'm just gonna sit this one out," he went beserk  and shouted, "It's because I'm SHORT, isn't it?!"

I kept saying no, I was tired, but everyone was staring at the guy and me, him still shouting. I practically ran out the door.

If it happened today I'd  say, "No, it's because you're a JERK!" 

[elay2433]

At party's I used to tell girls "Tell me a story." Which always got a response of "What?" Then I'd have to prompt them: "What's the craziest thing that ever happened to you, or what was your wierdest experience. Everybody's got a story."

Not exactly a pick up line, but it's the only one I ever had.

Suprisingly, more often than not they'd oblige. Got some intersting stories, (which sadly are lost  because I was usually quite drunk) but never a date.

No dates, but lots of teasing from my friends.

-elay

[SharonBell]

Elay! Your line is working! We're telling stories! Who's next? 

[Geoff_N]

I found telling a woman that her hair smelled nice worked every time. Corny but true.

At one undergrad party it had slipped out that I had a collection of antique maps in my bedsit. (my degree was in geography & maths. ) A beautiful goth asked if she could come home with me and see my collection. Haha. The joke was on me because being naive I really thought she wanted to see my real map collection...

Geoff

[Ed]

Mine was, "You don't sweat much for a fat girl." (Said with a grin) And I think it's a good line for an opening, because all females seem to have weight issues even if they're stick thin, and I don't tend to like people who take themselves too seriously, so if the girl laughed and called me a cheeky sod, or something, then I knew the ice was well and truly broken and from there we could talk like regular human beings. I had surprisingly few of them tell me to fuck off, but those who did were well within their rights to (and probably had fat ankles, or something )

[rsmccoy]

Mine was, "You don't sweat much for a fat girl." (Said with a grin) And I think it's a good line for an opening, because all females seem to have weight issues even if they're stick thin, and I don't tend to like people who take themselves too seriously, so if the girl laughed and called me a cheeky sod, or something, then I knew the ice was well and truly broken and from there we could talk like regular human beings. I had surprisingly few of them tell me to fuck off, but those who did were well within their rights to (and probably had fat ankles, or something )

We call them Cankles, because they are as big around as the woman's calf.

The worst line I heard that actually worked was from a friend of a friend. We went up to the bronx to pick him up and went to Manhatan clubing. He would walk up to a lady and say: "Hi, I'm Dave, these are my friends, Billy and Scott. Let me aks you a question, what's it going to take for me to get this (pointing at his package) into that (pointing, well you know where)."

I watched one lady slap him and the unpreturbed, he tried again and the next on laughed and said, "Well you could start by buying me a drink", to which Dave said "Let's drink!"

I aksed him later and he claimed 50% of the time he got slapped or a drink thrown in his face and the other 50%, it worked. I never had the balls to try it.

[SharonBell]

My husband had a frat brother who used to stand on campus and ask if woman who passed by if she wanted to fuck. DH said the frat bro had a 50% success rate, too. 

[evildeadgirl]

My husband had a frat brother who used to stand on campus and ask if woman who passed by if she wanted to fuck. DH said the frat bro had a 50% success rate, too. 

i have only one question---what was his major?

[Ed]

Yeah - I had a friend that used that line in Tenerife. I'm not sure what percentage hit rate he got, but he certainly got a few yeses. Amazing really.

[SharonBell]

My husband had a frat brother who used to stand on campus and ask if woman who passed by if she wanted to fuck. DH said the frat bro had a 50% success rate, too. 

i have only one question---what was his major?

PSYCHOLOGY. 

[JonP]

 

I guess that proves that you'll get enough success if you're prepared to put up with a few rejections ...

[SharonBell]

Exactly. To misquote the great Babe Ruth (a Baltimore hero) "If you don't get up to bat, you'll never hit a home run." [Ruth hit 714 home runs in 8,398 at bats --an 8% success rate]

[SamLeeFreak]

Guys don't really hit on me. I would grab their asses and wait to see what happened 

[caseyquinn]

"Did it hurt?"

Expected response... "did what hurt?"


"When you fell from heaven, did it hurt?"