Monday Morning

[speyeder]

A friend once told me you can measure yourself as a person by what it takes to knock you off balance. The example he provided was "letting something as trivial as getting cutoff on the freeway cause you to lose it". That being said, this is how what I thought might be a "regular day" started for me a couple of years back...

  I was on my way to my 9 to 5 and going to make two stops, one for coffee and one for breakfast. There was a lady standing at the coffee accessory table at Starbuck's dipping her stir stick and tasting continuously for about 3 minutes without adding anything new. This process continued whilst her son and I waited anxiously for her to snap out of it. I had just paid $4 for a cup of Java so MY goal was make  a quick getaway, putting distance between myself and a mild sense of shame. She wakes up, things begin moving again and that one is done (fade to black).  Next shot opens at the grocery, where  I grab a snack and get in line behind a mother and her possibly 12 year old son, who appears to have a mild case of Down's Syndrome. My wife (then Fiancee) is on the cell phone and we are in the process of saying our "have a good day I love yoooos" when I notice the kid staring at me. Actually it is more than a stare, falling in a spot somewhere between mad-dog and serial killer. After about 50 seconds of this, all of which count when you are on the way to work, I look him right in the eye and say "Good morning". He mumbles something in a tone I am not sure how to read, and gets a "cut it out" and a poke in the shoulder from his Mom. In the midst of wondering "What?" and "Why?"" I realize that I am not the first person this has happened to, so I go back to the routine of being a regular guy. This prompts the kid to state loudly and with a good deal of I mean it in his voice, "YOU SHOULD WEAR A DOG ON YOUR HEAD"! The words "DOG" and "HEAD" impact my frontal lobe and leave their mark as "Why?" and "What?" where still jockeying for pole position in my conscious mind. What the HELL does that mean? and Why  is this kid throwing what one would assume to be one of his meaner declarations at a stranger without cause? I hear my thumb-tip make a little snap as my right hand becomes a fist by itself, military training making ready without taking any type of stance. I take notice of the cashier's WTF?! expression as a cautious chuckle escapes him in reaction to what will be the story of the hour once "Dog Head" has left the building. All this happened in the span of a few seconds before Mom's hand kinda smacked and grabbed the kid's mouth at the same time. She gets right in his face and says "YOU STOP IT!!!" and then warmly apologizes to me, and all I can come up with is "Don't worry, It's okay" like this happens all the time. I try to sound understanding, feeling sorry for the kid, which is probably the last thing he wants from a dog-head like myself.  Later I come to the conclusion that maybe mom had a lack of patience for a child who needed little more.  I wonder if her aggressive behaviour was necessary and if it was where junior learned his. So with the mystery of Why? still lingering, I tried to see the lesson and decide what I should take from this experience.

  Did "keeping my balance" mean I had evolved some in my mid-thirties, leaving my hand holstered and calmly riding out the adrenaline? If there is one thing I can be sure of it is the fact that we have all had worse days, and I have certainly been called worse names. I  imagine the possibility of my check-out pal having fun and laughing with other strangers and it leaves me feeling hurt and uncool. I pull into my usual space in front of the office, smile in the rear-view mirror and say to myself  "Drop It, Dog head". 

[speyeder]

A friend once told me you can measure yourself as a person by what it takes to knock you off balance. The example he provided was "letting something as trivial as getting cutoff on the freeway cause you to lose it". That being said, this is how what I thought might be a "regular day" started for me a couple of years back...

  I was on my way to my 9 to 5 and going to make two stops, one for coffee and one for breakfast. There was a lady standing at the coffee accessory table at Starbuck's dipping her stir stick and tasting continuously for about 3 minutes without adding anything new. This process continued whilst her son and I waited anxiously for her to snap out of it. I had just paid $4 for a cup of Java so MY goal was make  a quick getaway, putting distance between myself and a mild sense of shame. She wakes up, things begin moving again and that one is done (fade to black).  Next shot opens at the grocery, where  I grab a snack and get in line behind a mother and her possibly 12 year old son, who appears to have a mild case of Down's Syndrome. My wife (then Fiancee) is on the cell phone and we are in the process of saying our "have a good day I love yoooos" when I notice the kid staring at me. Actually it is more than a stare, falling in a spot somewhere between mad-dog and serial killer. After about 50 seconds of this, all of which count when you are on the way to work, I look him right in the eye and say "Good morning". He mumbles something in a tone I am not sure how to read, and gets a "cut it out" and a poke in the shoulder from his Mom. In the midst of wondering "What?" and "Why?"" I realize that I am not the first person this has happened to, so I go back to the routine of being a regular guy. This prompts the kid to state loudly and with a good deal of I mean it in his voice, "YOU SHOULD WEAR A DOG ON YOUR HEAD"! The words "DOG" and "HEAD" impact my frontal lobe and leave their mark as "Why?" and "What?" where still jockeying for pole position in my conscious mind. What the HELL does that mean? and Why  is this kid throwing what one would assume to be one of his meaner declarations at a stranger without cause? I hear my thumb-tip make a little snap as my right hand becomes a fist by itself, military training making ready without taking any type of stance. I take notice of the cashier's WTF?! expression as a cautious chuckle escapes him in reaction to what will be the story of the hour once "Dog Head" has left the building. All this happened in the span of a few seconds before Mom's hand kinda smacked and grabbed the kid's mouth at the same time. She gets right in his face and says "YOU STOP IT!!!" and then warmly apologizes to me, and all I can come up with is "Don't worry, It's okay" like this happens all the time. I try to sound understanding, feeling sorry for the kid, which is probably the last thing he wants from a dog-head like myself.  Later I come to the conclusion that maybe mom had a lack of patience for a child who needed little more.  I wonder if her aggressive behaviour was necessary and if it was where junior learned his. So with the mystery of Why? still lingering, I tried to see the lesson and decide what I should take from this experience.

  Did "keeping my balance" mean I had evolved some in my mid-thirties, leaving my hand holstered and calmly riding out the adrenaline? If there is one thing I can be sure of it is the fact that we have all had worse days, and I have certainly been called worse names.  I pull into my usual space in front of the office, smile in the rear-view mirror and say to myself  "Drop It, Dog head". 

[Ed]

I don't know why, but that scene in Nine Months springs to mind, where Tom Arnold's character is fighting with a guy in a purple dinosaur costume who keep heckling him with insults. It's not really much of an achievement to hold your temper while being insulted by a twelve year-old retarded kid, though, Spey

[Caz]

"YOU SHOULD WEAR A DOG ON YOUR HEAD"!

  That' one of the strangest insults I've ever heard. Wouldn't know whether to laugh or be angry if someone said it to me.

[speyeder]

I don't know why, but that scene in Nine Months springs to mind, where Tom Arnold's character is fighting with a guy in a purple dinosaur costume who keep heckling him with insults. It's not really much of an achievement to hold your temper while being insulted by a twelve year-old retarded kid, though, Spey

It is a heckuva leap from where I was twenty years ago though...