April 9th
A group of Swahili tribesmen encircled the stage, glaring at my sweat-soaked face behind the podium. My mind was completely bland, yet my mouth just started moving.
“Ladies and gentlemen. Uh, If somebody told me that I would wake up this morning and find myself in front of a large group of um…of African peoples…wait, people…giving a speech on something for which I was completely unprepared, I probably wouldn’t have believed them.”
I awake. Just another nightmare.
My life is a complete paradox. During the day, my mind is at peace; but at night, my sleep becomes plagued with nightmares. I first started having nightmares when I was only several years of age. Medical science can only speculate where nightmares come from, but it is believed that nightmares stem from a…terrifying part of the brain.
1:45 P.M.
Phone call to psychologist
Receptionist: West hills Medical Group, how may I help you?
Myself: Oh, uh, sorry. I wasn’t expecting a receptionist. Listen, I need to speak to a psychologist.
Receptionist: Would you like to make an appointment?
Myself: You know, I’m a little tied up right now for appointments. Is there any way you can just do this over the phone?
Receptionist: We don’t do that actually.
Myself: Well that’s really too bad, because this kind of an emergency.
Receptionist: Can you give me your last name? Are you a patient here?
Myself: Of course I’m a patient here. I mean, Jesus, what do you think I’m trying to do?
Receptionist: Last name?
Myself: My last name. Hmm…uh…man! I’m sorry. What did you just ask me?
Receptionist: Can I please have your last name?
Myself: Do you even know what a nightmare is?
An abrupt end to an abrupt conversation.
April 10th
The nightmares are getting stranger. Last night I dreamed that a movie I owned had been modified to fit my screen. When I woke up, it was true. Perhaps there is some purpose to these nightmares. For example, in 1997 I dreamed that the Jolly Green Giant fell down; and this was more than five years before the 9/11 disaster. How many lives could be spared if I learned to listen to my nightmares? Obviously the real nightmare is the one we live in today.
Children who don’t know how to read.
Vehicles with over-polluting exhaust fumes.
Babies…who don’t know how to crawl.
Am I being selfish? I envy those who sleep peacefully, dreaming of healthy things like fruits and vegetables. Is it a curse? Is it a blessing? Is it both? No, it’s just a curse. My curse. My…nightmares.
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